Skip to main content
Why the wait?

This topic is one that generates understandable controversy among people. As with several other topical issues, people's opinions are diverse. When is the right time for a male or a female to get married?
Everyone frowns at 'early marriage'.  In fact, many 'reasonable' parents would chase you out of their homes if you ever attempt to come for their 'under-aged' daughters' hand in marriage. Legally, a female less than sixteen is considered not ready for marriage while a boy should be at least eighteen before mooting marriage. Even at that, many still are not at home with the 'sixteen' and 'eighteen' years maturity age for females and males respectively.

Due to the increasing  demand for western  education, the popular opinion is that a person is only ready and mature for marriage when the fellow is through with tertiary education, and perhaps in the case of men, secure gainful employment. In the case of men, this is understandable, however in the case of women, I beg to differ.

These days, children mature a lot faster. As young as nine years, a lot of girls attain puberty these days, and thus begin to exhibit the attendant behavioural transformations that go with such stage. Due to exposure to and poor censorship of the internet and home videos, as well as peer pressure, children start having sexual relations at a very young age. Therefore, parents who vouch for their children's 'innocence' may be made to eat their words when they eventually discover how far their children have gone!

Go to our university campuses, you will see a lot of campus 'couples' living together as though they are married. They stay together under the same roof only for most of them to go their separate ways after graduation owing to irreconcilable differences. Was it not better if they had just married formally, at least for the sake of morality?

Early marriage is different from premature marriage. As far as I  am concerned, any girl that has attained the age of puberty and as well completed a minimum of secondary school education is ready for marriage. Happily, there are a lot of testimonies of women who gained tertiary education while in their husbands houses, and still achieved their dreams! Is it not better to live with a husband than waste valuable time with playboys, sugar daddies and the lots. Which one is more time consuming? Girls who are quick to play down the importance of marriage by saying that 'marriage is not everything' has not feted with the plethora of single 'made' ladies who even with their fame and fortune, still lead emotionally bankrupt lives. Some of them pretend to be happy and undaunted, but we know the truth.

A lot of abortions would have been averted if girls who did such had channelled their feminine strength on their legally married husbands than on 'hit and run' guys. Some of these girls claim not to be ready for marriage, but would end up in prayer houses later in life in search of 'life partners.'

Marriage may not be the only yardstick to measure one's achievements, but it's something that is socially, religiously and psychologically satisfying. Marriage has spurred a lot of people to attain success, while its demands have weighed down others who rushed into it without being psychologically and perhaps financially ready for it. But come to think of it, if you can be in romantic relationship with as much as ten men at a time, don't you think you are simply deceiving yourself thinking that you are not ripe for marriage? To be continued...
Chukwudi Anagbogu

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Grandma series 1 (Chukwudi Anagbogu)

 I was among the few privileged ones to have lived with my grandmother during my childhood. My grandma had visited us for the “omugwo” of my younger sibling. At the ‘expiration` of three months, she had opted to stay longer because as she would always say, “anywhere one stays is one's home.”  My siblings and I received news of her “extension” with mixed feelings. Our concerns were borne out of her strictness. She was so strict that sometimes you wondered how my mother-her daughter survived childhood under her watch. It was during her stay that my immediate elder brother and I stopped bedwetting. Hitherto, my parents had employed all manner of tactics to stop us from betwetting, all to to avail. First, my mum had tried reducing our water intake, especially at nights. According to her, not taking enough water would reduce the urge to urinate at night. The strategy seemed to work initially, as we did not bed wet for three consecutive days. On the fourth day however, the unthinkab...
Post a Comment
Read more

RELATIONSHIP RUINED BY ZEE WORLD

 Story by Chukwudi Anagbogu  In the bustling city of Lagos, Nigeria, evenings once meant family time—gathering around the dinner table, sharing stories, and connecting over meals. But things began to change when Zee World, the Indian television channel showcasing Hindi dramas, became a household staple. It all started innocently enough. Adama, a young woman in her late twenties, was drawn to the elaborate storylines and dramatic twists of the telenovelas. With their glitzy portrayals of love, betrayal, and family drama, she found herself mesmerized by characters like Rani and Raj. Each night, she tuned in, eager to see how the latest episode would unfold. At first, Adama’s enthusiasm was infectious. Her younger brother, Chike, and her parents would join her on the sofa, laughing and gasping at the ridiculous plot turns. But as weeks turned into months, something shifted. Adama began prioritizing her viewing schedule over family interactions. Dinners turned quiet as everyone wa...
Post a Comment
Read more

SEX GONE WRONG: A TOUCHING STORY

  By Chukwudi Anagbogu  In the bustling city of Lagos, Nigeria, life moves fast. Among the endless honking of cars, the vibrant chatter of market vendors, and the warm tropical breeze, lived a young woman named Amaka. At twenty-four, she was a soft-spoken, diligent student of Accounting at the University of Lagos. Life for her had been a steady rhythm of family, studies, and church. Amaka had always been the dutiful daughter—never one to step out of line, and she upheld her moral values with a deep-rooted sense of pride. But like many young women her age, Amaka longed for something more. Though she was content with her life, a part of her wondered about love—the kind of love she read about in novels and heard about in songs. She had seen friends fall in love, sometimes stumbling and getting hurt, but other times finding happiness. Yet, she had always been cautious, holding her heart close and believing that love would find her when the time was right. That time came when she m...
1 comment
Read more